Pity Parties and Paradox

“Pity makes suffering contagious” – that was Nietzsche’s take on it. Nietzsche, perhaps above all else, hated what he termed the ‘will to nothingness;’ he saw a society riddled with self-righteous self-loathing, which rejected strength and vigor and replaced them with glorified masochism. In his own words, he was fighting the power of “weakness, of envy, of revenge” against health and life, “a contempt for all good and honest instincts” that converts “every value into an un-value, every truth into a lie, every integrity into a vileness of the soul” as “the one great curse, the one great innermost corruption, the one great instinct of revenge…”

I’ve noticed this tendency myself, although not nearly to the extent he describes. It’s the reminder that you shouldn’t enjoy your dinner too much because somewhere, children are starving. It’s the idea that you should mourn your promotion because someone else didn’t get it and is disappointed. It’s the argument that you should never acknowledge your problems, because someone always has it worse.

I could go on, but I’m sure you’ve encountered it yourself. I’m with Nietzsche on this one; I find these arguments very frustrating. Every time I read Nietzsche’s descriptions, I think of Dickens’ Uriah Heep, whom I remember loathing as a child as soon as I met him. He’s a smarmy sycophant seemingly obsessed with how unworthy he is, who impresses even his prison warden with his devout piety. Prison warden, because he’s the book’s villain, and rightfully so. Of all Dickens’ villains, I think I shall always dislike Uriah Heep most.

However, I do disagree with Nietzsche on one very important point. He has a name for this masochistic sickness; he calls it Christianity. I won’t go into the actual arguments for the truth or falsity of Christianity; that wasn’t Nietzsche’s primary concern. I will instead insist that this attitude is not Christianity at all, and if it appear to be so at times, it is only in the way that a puddle of water might appear to be the sky in a reflection. This sickness, in fact, is what morality becomes if you take Christianity out of it.

Christianity doesn’t hate physical, everyday life and being; it’s not against them. Nor does Christianity act as science does, and say that physicality is neutral; it’s simply there, not subject to judgment. No, Christianity starts out with the assertion, “God saw everything that He had made, and indeed it was very good.” Christianity affirms life, vitality, and strength. It describes life as a constant celebration of the goodness inherent in nature and inherent in ourselves, intrinsic to being itself. It says that God gave us the talents and abilities we have, and not only intends, but insists that we use them as best we can.

Now, it’s true that Christianity calls for denial, but this denial is predicated on a worldview that takes the larger world to be a wondrous, magical place, brimming with life. What Christianity wants us to deny is the selfish nature in us, the part of us that turns away from the wonder around us and in toward our own greedy desires and aims. Wonder and awe require a vulnerability and openness; you can’t wonder at something you control. And so, if we ever want to achieve the true happiness and magic that are in the world, we have to give up always wanting things to go our way. We have to stop focusing on ourselves to really reach ourselves, the way you have to step back from a picture to see it properly, or refocus your eyes to see the bottom of a lake instead of your reflection on the surface.

Of course, this attitude requires a great deal of risk. Christianity calls us to let go of partial fulfillment in order to gain real fulfillment, the way you have to hold back from wolfing down all the chips and salsa at the beginning of a meal if you want to be able to finish the main dish. When you do this, there’s always the chance that you’ll be suddenly called away after the appetizer and be unable to finish your meal (especially if you’re a superhero – something to keep in mind when considering careers). In which case, you might be better off scarfing down the appetizers. So everything really depends on how much faith you have that the main meal is coming.

So it does really come down to the truth or falsity of Christianity, but I’ve already said I’m not discussing that here. What I will say, is that I think morality and ethics are important. I think there is some good in this world, and it’s worth fighting for. I don’t think it’s about saying no to things; I think it’s about, as Nietzsche said, “saying Yes to life” – a life that’s full of ideals, like truth and honor and justice, that we should get as close to as we can. But since Nietzsche doesn’t believe in my ideals, he thinks I’m being silly and missing out on ‘real life’.

I don’t think ‘real life’ is worth much if it doesn’t have ideals in it. If we keep morality and ethics, if we keep fighting, but we refuse to acknowledge ideals beyond those of our own making, we’re left with nothing worth fighting for, and so we end up with a morality that isn’t ‘for’ anything, but only ‘against’ things. It’s hard to find things that are obviously right without context, but it’s easy to find things that are just plain wrong, so we settle for those. And we end up with Nietzsche’s “great curse.”

Christianity itself rejects this turn; it says that if there is no resurrection from the dead, we ought to give up on Christianity. Because Christianity does consist in holding back – but only if we’re holding back for better things. So celebrate your promotions, acknowledge your frustrations, and don’t forget that life is meant to be celebrated. But don’t eat so much chips and salsa that you don’t have room for the main course.